[Is any of this supposed to deter Sampo from a good bite and cuddle? Gepard basically wants him as his own personal body pillow, and Sampo’s gone long enough without positive human contact that he’ll gladly be Gepard’s weighted blanket. The good Captain is warm and comfortable and his hands are lovely at his nape and back.]
[It’s really a shame. What a waste of a perfectly good man, Sampo would gladly give him some special services if he was only so inclined. But Gepard would have no interest in that kind of thing from him, so there’s no use in even offering.]
[And instead of focusing on touching him, Gepard is fixated on the people eating thing.]
It is! Eating somebody makes it sound like I’m tearing chunks off or something. What I’m doing is barely worse than a blood donation.
[He tips his head a little to give the good Captain some serious side-eye.]
Hey. Just let me take the win where I can get it, okay?
[He’s an obligate bloodsucker and it’s objectively awful, at least let him have his little semantic arguments.]
[Figaro's turning his head- Gepard grunts because that makes him less comfortable, what is this, what's going on, two heterosexual men zero feet apart because they're not gay, and one of them is wiggling a bit.
And now Gepard's moving to give Figaro a little bit of side-eye.]
I liked you better when you didn't move as much, Figaro.
[And here Gepard is, rubbing little circles onto Figaro's back. It'll be a bit of a shame to lose his weighted blanket, and Gepard makes a face at the thought - it's nice having someone to cuddle, even if that someone happens to have weird dietary requirements and is an amazing cook.
Maybe this is a sign he needs to get a pet? Like a dog, if Belobog was a normal planet that had room for pets. But they probably have something.]
I've really enjoyed all of your food. I have no doubt I'll love whatever it is you come up with next, Figaro.
It's kind of nice to have a reason to cook again. And you've been easy to please.
[Simple but hearty fare seems to satisfy Gepard-- roast meat and potatoes for dinner, eggs and crusty bread, fried sandwiches. It almost feels like cheating when it's this easy. But, well, he shouldn't say that, because he's not trying to win Gepard's heart over through his stomach or anything. But maybe lovely Miss Bronya will be able to do that, or whatever other pretty lady catches Gepard's eye.]
[For now, Sampo will just take advantage of the appreciation and back rubs and the occasional free people-flavored juice box. Especially the back rub, boy. Isn't Gepard being all nice and accommodating today!]
I should make bread for you sometime. I got bored once and spent like a month figuring out how to make a good sourdough, it'd be a shame to let all that work go to waste just because I can't have carbs.
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[It’s really a shame. What a waste of a perfectly good man, Sampo would gladly give him some special services if he was only so inclined. But Gepard would have no interest in that kind of thing from him, so there’s no use in even offering.]
[And instead of focusing on touching him, Gepard is fixated on the people eating thing.]
It is! Eating somebody makes it sound like I’m tearing chunks off or something. What I’m doing is barely worse than a blood donation.
[He tips his head a little to give the good Captain some serious side-eye.]
Hey. Just let me take the win where I can get it, okay?
[He’s an obligate bloodsucker and it’s objectively awful, at least let him have his little semantic arguments.]
no subject
And now Gepard's moving to give Figaro a little bit of side-eye.]
I liked you better when you didn't move as much, Figaro.
no subject
[A little bro massage, as bros do. There’s nothing weird about rubbing another man’s back in a totally platonic and heterosexual way.]
Just a few more minutes, before I make lunch? It’s going to be a really good lunch, you’ll want to thank me for it.
[He’s going to make a sandwich so good that Gepard continues to question his sexuality.]
no subject
[And here Gepard is, rubbing little circles onto Figaro's back. It'll be a bit of a shame to lose his weighted blanket, and Gepard makes a face at the thought - it's nice having someone to cuddle, even if that someone happens to have weird dietary requirements and is an amazing cook.
Maybe this is a sign he needs to get a pet? Like a dog, if Belobog was a normal planet that had room for pets. But they probably have something.]
I've really enjoyed all of your food. I have no doubt I'll love whatever it is you come up with next, Figaro.
no subject
[Simple but hearty fare seems to satisfy Gepard-- roast meat and potatoes for dinner, eggs and crusty bread, fried sandwiches. It almost feels like cheating when it's this easy. But, well, he shouldn't say that, because he's not trying to win Gepard's heart over through his stomach or anything. But maybe lovely Miss Bronya will be able to do that, or whatever other pretty lady catches Gepard's eye.]
[For now, Sampo will just take advantage of the appreciation and back rubs and the occasional free people-flavored juice box. Especially the back rub, boy. Isn't Gepard being all nice and accommodating today!]
I should make bread for you sometime. I got bored once and spent like a month figuring out how to make a good sourdough, it'd be a shame to let all that work go to waste just because I can't have carbs.